I feel like a giant walking belly. Sometimes I feel like the only thing I am is a walking belly without a head, arms and legs. It’s uncomfortable. I waddle, I can hardly wear my heels anymore and when I run, I feel like people are laughing because I am running so slow and I wonder if they think I just have a huge gut. 😦 I have been wishing for my old belly back for a past week. I would never by any means give up my baby of course and I love to feel him kickin and squirming inside. That’s the only time I love being this huge. *sign* I wonder now, looking back at pictures of my belly, why I thought I had a huge belly. I miss getting up and out of bed with ease, I miss feeling womenly even though this is as womenly as a women can get. lol. I am just afraid once the baby is here that I won’t have time to devote to running anymore and I hate that I am going to have to start from scratch again. Working up to running at a good speed and ease is SO difficult for me to attain. I remember when I first started running 6 years or so ago, I could hardly run 10 minutes without having to stop. That was tough but at the height of my running capability, I was able to run 5 miles in 45 minutes with shin splints. I know it’s not a fast time by any means but it sure beats running 1 1/2 miles in 20 minutes like I am right now. My belly button is starting to get pulled out. I love my innie. It’s hard to watch it slowly disappear. It’s getting smaller and smaller by the day and soon it’ll be poppin out instead. I know I sound horribly sad, but I’m not. I just miss my old body. Pregnancy is awesome, just knowing and feeling my baby inside me is quite an experience words can’t effectively describe. It’s just those moments of an unruly bladder, a semi-functioning colon, and gasping for air-I-can’t-breathe times when I get so exhausted and tired I wonder if I am strong willed enough to last through labor. Usually, my belly is the only pregnant belly I see at home (obviously!) and I feel enormous. Then I go to church, visit my pregnant friends and am reminded, I still have SO much more to grow. I am afraid of what the scale is going to say at my next appointment. Then I see the ultrasounds of Benton and my heart melts and I can’t get enough of him. I imagine a mini Brandon and I giggle and think ‘I’m going to have 3 boys soon.’ Leben (our doggie) will chase Benton, Benton will chase Brandon and they’ll all play together with Legos. While mommy relaxes outside in the cool breeze of WA with an iced latte in her hand. Sure, that’s a few years down the line when I’ll probably be pregnant with our second baby but HEY! A girl can dream!
I’m slowly getting back into the swing of things. By that I mean, baking and blogging. I’ve been in such a rutt since I got pregnant with baking that if my heart isn’t fully in it, I don’t get the results I am looking for. So I gave up for a while. Slowly, it’s coming back, just in time for us to pack up all our stuff and move again! Perfect timing! With catalogs coming in the mail advertising for the upcoming holidays, I feel all tingly inside with thoughts of hot apple cider, sitting next to the fire place, cuddling with the husband, thoughts of a Christmas tree and time with the family makes me think of food. Food and Pumpkin. I always make pumpkin muffins whenever I think of pumpkin, so this time I decided I would make something different so I went to Nestles website (they obviously make Libbys pumpkin puree) and I found this yummy Pumpkin Whoopie Pie recipe. They’re suppose to make mini whoopie pies but my patience is thin and not wanting to totally destroy these I opted for giantosaurus sized whoopie pies. It kinda resembles my tummy as of late, so it makes perfect sense! They’re delicious and so easy to make. I recommend this to anyone who has 30 minutes to spare! Enjoy guys!